Trust and Obey

Okay . . .

I have to be really honest with you. I've been feeling a bit discouraged lately. I mean, I know that God is in control and that He has a plan and that He loves me. I know this.

But it's hard when the thing that is most dear to my heart--my husband's salvation--is so OUT of my control. And the thing that I struggle with most--my health--is equally out of my control.

My husband seems no closer to coming to faith (and in fact, this weekend we had a few talks, and he seems farther than ever). And after a few weeks of feeling relatively well, I've taken several steps back with my health. So, I question why (seems like a recurring theme in these blog postings, doesn't it?).

Then this morning as I drove into work, I was listening to a podcast from Dr. Charles Stanley. He was talking about fully trusting God. Even though I don't audibly hear God's voice, He does speak to me, and He spoke to me this morning:

Do you really trust Me?

Do you really want to do whatever I ask of you?

Even if it's not what you want yourself?

I'd love to tell you that I responded with a resounding , "YES, Lord!"

But no . . . I have to say that I struggle with this. If I truly trust Him, then I have to accept that it may be His plan that Russ not come to faith for a very long time . . . If I truly trust Him, then I have to accept that I may never be fully well . . .

And am I willing to do that? I pray I am.

I pray that I am . . .