Sex in Marriage (1 Cor. 7:1-7)

But because of immoralities, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband. The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. But this I say by way of concession, not of command. Yet I wish that all men were even as I myself am. However, each man has his own gift from God, one in this manner, and another in that.
(1 Corinthians 7:1-7, NASB)

In these verses, Paul is clearly gives two messages. One is for married folks, and the other is for singles.

Marriage is a partnership, and each partner is to “fulfill his (or her) duty” to his (or her) spouse. And frankly, he’s talking about sex here. Each has “authority” over the other’s body, and to use sex as a weapon is wrong. In healthy marriages, each partner should be satisfied with the couple’s sex life. The couple should be in agreement about when, where, and how.

Then, bookending this message to those married, he writes to the singles. His very first verse of this chapter shows Paul’s heart: He really thinks that the celibate, single life is more conducive to serving God. And the last verse reiterates this thought. Paul was single, and he “wish[ed] that all men were even as [he was].” Again, to be frank, in many ways, he’s right. A single person has more time (and energy) to serve God. He can spend more time in Bible study. He can volunteer more. He doesn’t have anyone competing for God’s attention.

But Paul is very aware that celibacy isn’t for everyone. And so, if the possibility of immorality exists, then a man or woman must be married to meet his or her sexual drive.

Paul doesn’t give a middle ground: If you want sex, get married. If you’re going to stay single, don’t have sex.

Simple, isn’t it?