True Intimacy (1 Thessalonians 4:3-6)

Today’s scripture: 1 Thessalonians 4:3-6

I believe that God originally created man and woman (Genesis 1:27), and through them, provided the means for procreation: part of man and part of woman (Genesis 1:28). For reasons only He knows (and I'm not complaining!), that procreation comes naturally through sexual intercourse.

But I also believe that God, in His infinite wisdom, chose to make that act truly pleasurable, something that actually “cleaves” a husband and wife. Nothing is more intimate than sexually connecting with another person, and I believe God intends for sex to be between married people. It is beautiful in His sight for a husband and wife to give themselves to each other in this way (see 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 in The Message paraphrase).

Anything else goes against God’s original design.

Our bodies are temples housing the very Spirit of God. We must protect them and use them only in a way that pleases and glorifies God. And that includes making certain that we keep ourselves pure unless we are in a God-designed “leaving and cleaving” relationship—a covenant blessed by God (Genesis 2:24).

Married People: Stay Together! (1 Corinthians 7:8-11)

Today's scripture: 1 Corinthians 7:8-11

Today’s verses begin by reiterating Paul’s exhortations we looked at yesterday. Single people stay single and serve God, but if their sexual drive is strong, they should get married. Then he goes on to instruct married people, and he reminds his readers that these instructions come from the Lord, not from him.

Married couples should stay married. Bottom line.

Paul writes that wives should not leave their husbands and that husbands should not divorce their wives.  

Marriage—Christian marriage—is a covenant relationship, with God at the center. And it is meant to be for life. Hebrews 13:4 states, “Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.” Nothing—nothing—should break this covenant.

Yet, Christian marriages break up all the time. The Bible gives two “reasons” for divorce (and I believe implies a third). The first is infidelity (see Matthew 19:9), and the second will be addressed tomorrow. The implied third is in cases of abuse, and I believe this because the Bible is clear that wives are to respect their husbands, and husbands are to love their wives as Christ loves us (see Ephesians 5:22-26). Abuse is neither respect nor love.

The fact that Christian marriages end because of “irreconcilable differences” is one of the biggest tragedies of our age. “I just don’t love him anymore,” she says. “We’ve grown apart,” he insists.

I’m sorry (well, no I’m not sorry), but committed couples understand that love and passion ebb and flow, and they work through those times when things may not be all “roses and sunshine.”

And guess what? Couples cannot “grow” apart. Growth implies maturity and health. Instead, couples fall apart. Sadly, it’s often because they just don’t try. They aren’t willing to work during the hard times.

It’s tragic. Truly tragic.

The Joy of Sex (1 Corinthians 6:15-16)

Today's scripture: 1 Corinthians 6:15-16

I believe one of the saddest commentaries of this present age is the ease with which people treat sex. What God created as an intimate experience to be contained within the confines of marriage has become a commodity, a throw-away.

One night stands. Multiple partners. “Friends with benefits.”

It just breaks my heart.

Sex is more than just an act of pleasure or release. Two people, when they engage in sex—which includes oral sex, by the way—become, as the Bible says, “one flesh.” They exchange bodily fluids, and part of each becomes part of the other.

It’s more than just physical, though. Sex, as its very best, brings an emotional bond that should be unbreakable. One definition of intimate is “belonging to or characterizing one's deepest nature.” Being sexually intimate with someone should mean becoming “one flesh”: body, soul, and mind.

Yet, even in the Christian community, people seem to think it’s okay to have sex outside of marriage. It’s “old-fashioned” to remain a virgin until marriage, they say. Now, to be honest, I wasn’t a virgin when I was married, and I’d had one other partner besides my husband. But it was during a very lengthy rebellion against my God, and at least I acknowledged that did was sinful. I just did it anyway.

Today, however, it seems like young Christians don’t even think it’s wrong. They’ve bought into the world’s lies that sex is just one more thing to do.

And it’s not. Not in the way God intended, at least.

We need to return to God’s original plan. We need to “leave and cleave” in marriage, and treat sex with the dignity and intimacy that God intended.